I understand that there is divine timing in everything. Creations are born THROUGH you and not neccesarily FROM you. On their way out of your body and system they pick up on fragments of your experience and use that to launch themselves into the world around you. I have found it so much more beneficial to treat my creative process with that type of detachment. Am I right? I'm not sure. What I do know is that if something wants to be created it will find a way, if a project wants to be heard it will be and there's not much you can do about it. I know from my own experience that if something wants to be written or painted or sung it will literally and viscerally “haunt” me until I sit down and make it. I can't concentrate, I can't sleep and I can't sit still until I have begun the process. That's how every painting, every album and every book begins. I can't sit still until something is finished which is why, as I have discovered this year, that book writing is an emotionally gruelling process.
I fit in my creativity and my projects in and around my day job. Fortunately my day job offers me a lot of spare hours here and there and I make a point of taking a day off each week to have my downtime. I can write a song in under 5 minutes, I can do a painting in an afternoon ( a small one anyway ) but writing a book? That takes time. If writing were my day job then I imagine the book would have been written in about 3 months but only having a day a week to get my teeth into it, it's taken a whole year. I also have gotten guilty in the making of this book, if I am sat watching a movie my brain tells me that I “should” be writing. My ego comes squarely into play and the game begins. I do have to remind myself that I am not the sole creator of this book and that all I can do it be open and ready to write. The writing process is something that happens. Anyone that has created anything will understand this. When you've sat at a canvas, or a piano, or your laptop and NOTHING is coming to you there is no point in creating. If you go ahead and try to create when you're not feeling it then more than often what you create will be utter crap or just not connected to you in any way.
So here I am at the end point of novel writing or so I currently believe. It's bells and whistels at this point. Yes I know I am being picky but I would rather have my best work out there than something that's rushed. I've done that before with songs and paintings and I've always regretted it. There's no point in putting all this work in and then rushing the last bit. In the next few weeks I will be printing out a manuscript to give to some family and friends to have a read and get my first bunch of feedback. When you've worked on something for this long you can go a little word blind. If there are any major gaps or things that I might have missed then these are my first editors! I can't wait to see what they think. But for now, I am just going to carry on mumbling over it whist being cautious that I don't over do it and as always I'll get back to you on my progress!